Today happiness seems like an elusive, unobtainable emotion to many. Every one of us has a different viewpoint and measure on HAPPINESS or on what being HAPPY means.
Happiness is an emotional state of being and means different things to different people. For those suffering ill health, happiness for them may mean being healthy, to students studying their final exams happiness is a result that allows them to follow a career of their choosing, to people with long term weight issues – happiness is being their ideal weight. For those suffering heartbreak – happiness is being in love.
So, what’s your happiness gauge? Do you know?
Are you happy in your personal life? Are you happy in your work life? Do you know what you are passionate about?
Many people believe that happiness exists outside of themselves, that they need someone or something to make them happy. They live in the past of the future often making statement such as “when I am wealthy, I will be happy”, “When I am slim, I will be happy” or” I will be happy when I have found the right person for me”.
Happiness cannot be found anywhere but inside of you; short term bursts of happiness may arise when you attain the above searches however, they are not sustainable because you cannot rely on someone or something to fill your emotional needs the void that you feel inside of you.
Self-love will bring you happiness and peace of mind
So how hard is it to love yourself?
It starts with accepting who you are inside. Visiting yourself, getting to know yourself, looking at yourself in the mirror and knowing that you are enough – no matter what anyone else thinks or says.
One of the few things that I say to all my clients is that you don’t live inside someone else’s head and neither do they live inside of yours -so their opinion of you, belongs to them unless you accept it.
Don’t accept anyone else’s point of view unless it’s in your best interest. Start cultivating and surrounding yourself with people whose values are aligned with yours.
Go out and find groups of people who share your passions or your interest it may be hard the first of 2nd time you meet strangers, like anything else it gets easier each time you go beyond your own personal barriers.
Be brave, you have all you need inside of you. Be kind to yourself, say positive things to yourself because your mind listens to the words you say. Re-frame any thoughts that are not positive or beneficial for you.
e.g. Reframe “I am not good enough” immediately to” I am enough, I may not have felt this way in the past – I do now” it is important to always always acknowledge how you previously felt because your subconscious mind listens to your words and if you simply don’t acknowledge how you used to feel, you will fall back into the habit of saying non beneficial words.
When you wake up spend 10 minutes being grateful for what you have, you can breathe, you have breath – without breath you have no life, be grateful for the fact you have 2 feet, that you have shoes to wear, be grateful that you can see that you can use your hands that work.
Start with what you have to be grateful for, start with your body, then extend your gratitude outwards. Gratitude is one of the most beneficial emotions you can have, it changes your energy and attracts positive energy back to you.
Do something for someone else without expecting anything in return.
Pick up the phone and speak to someone that you have not spoken to for ages, smile its better for your face, listen to your favourite music, watch comedy have a real belly laugh, help those less fortunate than you – volunteer your time even if it’s just an hour a month.
Teach people what you know.
Be gracious, say kind words, send love to others.
Forgive in your heart and set people free.
Live in the now.
Take time for yourself
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- Be kind to yourself.
- Take a walk in nature,
- look up at the stars at night with wonder,
- see beauty in every smile,
- be generous to yourself with self-praise,
- forgive those who hurt you in the past and set both yourself and them free,
- go out and buy something just for yourself,
- dress silly,
- be silly for a few minutes,
- watch a movie that makes you laugh out loud,
- Meditate daily even if it’s only for 12-15 minutes – there are 1440 minutes in a day.
*If you don’t know how to meditate keep an eye on my website where a free download will be available very soon
Happiness will soon be a part of your life.