Grief is intense sorrow caused by loss; this could be the loss of a job, the loss of our home, the breakdown of a relationship or the death of someone we care about.
This blog concentrates on the grief we experience when we lose someone who has meaning to us, someone who has been a part of our lives or has influenced our lives.
Often in our society, we mourn the loss of someone we may not have met, but who has had a profound effect on us; such grief was experienced by hundreds of thousands of people on the death of Diana, Princess of Wales some 20 years ago.
Dealing with death
Death is something that we all face; at some point we will die. We know this, yet when someone we care about passes, our emotions override our logic. Even after a terminal diagnosis—and we face the inevitable—we still experience grief when the person passes.
Some people experience grief so deeply that they feel they cannot survive.
The death of someone we care about impacts us in many different ways. If the passing is expected, the experience may differ from when someone is taken unexpectedly. When children die young or before their parents, the grief is compounded because the natural order has been broken. It is not uncommon for relationships to break down because both parents are grieving.
If the griever has unresolved issues, or where things are left unsaid with someone close who has passed, feelings of resentment, anger, bitterness, disappointment and regret may occur as there is no longer an opportunity to resolve the issue.
Traumatic deaths and death by suicide often cause deep distress as those left behind may feel a sense of guilt, a feeling that they should have known and been able to help. Yet, none of us live in the minds of others.
Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) can help you move through these processes.
Grief is a natural part of living
Although natural, grief can be affected by the relationship between the griever and the deceased, no two people will have the same experience.
All animals experience grief. Elephants, just like humans, live in close-knit herds (families) and when one dies the rest of the herd mourns that death. Their grief is evident.
Our grief can be compounded when those around us are uncomfortable discussing the deceased and we need to express our feelings.
Grief is a process. It takes time!
Too often in our busy western society, it is expected that we should move on and ‘get over it’ as soon as possible. Grief is as individual as we are. No two people share the same emotions when dealing with death and the subsequent grief. People who have deep religious or spiritual beliefs often find it easier to cope with the death of someone close.
Grief can be affected by our beliefs.
I am not a doctor, nor a psychiatrist, but an individual who has experienced grief through suicide; through tragedy, through my elderly parents passing and through a partner passing. My experience was different in each case.
With a Masters in neurolinguistic programming and a background in behavioural science, hypnotherapy and RTT, I may be able to offer you support and assistance in coping with your grief.